Regardless of whether your gym has an Olympic-size pool,
it’s
sure to have a great dating pool. And let’s
face it:
Unless you go there to sit outside the trampoline classes and
stare
at the leotarded (in which case …
eww),
you are at your buffest and best there. So
don’t blow it
with an opening line that’s so lame
she shoots you down
before you get anywhere near the part about her
joining you for a
smoothie and a protein bar.
Here
are five
common gym scenarios where you may find yourself weight belt
to
sports bra with a hot gymette. Follow this
workout,
and you might just meet a woman on your first set:
Location:
Stretching mats
Worst
line:
“Wow, I see you’re really
flexible. Are you a
dancer?”
She
thinks: “‘Flexible?’ I
know
where your dirty mind is going with that, you
perv.”
Best
line:
“You seem like you know what
you’re
doing. Got any suggestions to stretch my hamstrings?
They’re
killing me – they’re so
tight.”
The
logic: The second question seems more
legitimate.
Location:
Water fountain
Worst
line:
“Hey, leave some for the rest of
us!”
She
thinks:
“Wow, jerk. I’ve only heard
that 50 million
times.”
Best
line: “I swear, they really do manage to keep
the
water nice and cold here.”
The
logic: The first doesn’t leave her any way to
respond
if she does want to talk to you. The second
one could be a conversation starter, plus it’s something
everyone
who’s parched might actually be thinking. (Of course,
if
the water’s a bit warm, you can comment on that instead —
though you might come across as a bit of a whiner.)
Location:
Free weights
Worst
line:
“Need some help? You should hold it from
this
angle.”
She
thinks:
“Just because I’m a girl
using free weights, you
assume I need help? You
could use some help
with your approach, tool.”
Best
line: “Damn — 20 pounds. Not
bad!”
The
logic:
At last, an honest compliment from one fellow gym
rat to another.
That you noticed makes her feel strong.
Location:
The weights (machine or free). The situation: resting between
sets
Worst
line:
“I love this song,”
referring to the
music playing. Alternative:
“Who’s
winning?” referring to the game
on TV.
She
thinks: “I’m wearing an iPod, dummy.
I have no idea what you’re talking
about.”
Best
line:
“Do you mind if I work
in?”
The
logic:
This is the only direct question that makes any
sense here. Any
other directive breaks the gym cardinal rule,
“Thou shalt
never interrupt someone’s flow with an
irrelevant
question” (unless she’s screaming,
“Drop
dead, ref!” at the TV — then, by all means,
comment on
the score).
Location:
At the bikes, treadmill, Stairmaster or elliptical
Worst
line: “Can I buy you a drink when we get
there?”
She
thinks:
“Aren’t you the same guy who
used that stupid
water fountain line before?”
Best
line: “Ugh cardio, it always feels so good to
get
it over with.”
The
logic: It doesn’t mean you love or hate
cardio;
it’s just a general feeling about how good it feels to
be
able to check it off your list. If she wants to add to your comment,
she can; otherwise, you give her the out of just panting and nodding
yes
in agreement.
In case you
haven’t
figured it out after all this, when it comes to
meeting women at the
gym, the best lines don’t make a girl
feel trapped — or
obligated to answer you. They also let you save face
in case her
boyfriend is the huge power lifter giving you the evil eye
across the
room.