The spiel of the Manhattan subway panhandler is usually pretty predictable: “Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. I’m sorry to interrupt your ride ...” (This is usually followed by jaded passengers pushing their iPod buds in tight and averting their eyes.)

One day, though, that familiar refrain was followed by a completely unexpected pitch: “I graduated from college with a degree in marketing three months ago, and I really need a job.”

As subway riders looked up cautiously, they saw an impeccably groomed young man -- wearing a suit and freshly shined wingtips -- holding a stack of résumés. “If you know of anyone who might have positions open, I’d really appreciate it if you’d take one of these and pass it along.”

The fate of this earnest young grad remains unknown. But what do recruiters and HR pros generally think of this kind of creativity and moxie when it comes to job hunting? Is it OK to let your search go rogue?

“We’ve all seen the reports on CNN of job seekers wearing sandwich boards advertising their skills,” says Margo Morgenlander, founder of Professional Recruitment Solutions, a staffing company based in Orange County, Calif. “But that technique can backfire, particularly if you’re targeting a fairly conservative company.”

And don’t even think of posting photos of yourself on Facebook wearing that sandwich board or, worse, the gorilla outfit you rented to generate attention in your dream company’s parking lot. “Hiring managers absolutely check out your Facebook profile,” says Morgenlander. “When they see a picture like that, they’re going to say, ‘I don’t want that wackadoodle in my company.’” (But then, do you really want to work at a company where people use the word wackadoodle?)

Deborah Bell, a private certified career counselor in Santa Rosa, Calif., who also conducts workshops for Sonoma County’s employment and job-training program, agrees. “One of the most unusual instances I saw was of a candidate who taped a résumé to a box of chocolates.” This Forest Gump–style move makes more sense once Bell explains that the job listing read: “Must have a sense of humor and love chocolate.” And then there was the applicant whose cover letter said, “I’m a shoe-in for the job. The résumé was delivered in -- what else? -- a shoe!

Another example of clever self-promotion was pulled off by Alec Brownstein, a job seeker who used Google AdWords to buy search ads containing the names of the creative directors whose attention he sought. Any time one of them Googled themselves, Brownstein’s ad appeared, calling out for attention -- and a job. He ultimately landed a position at the white-glove Madison Avenue firm Young & Rubicam. What does Morgenlander think of this modern-day Mad Men scheme? “It was simply brilliant -- for his target audience. Would I suggest this strategy for other professions? Not necessarily.”

Vicki Salemi, a New York–based career expert, public speaker and author of Big Career in the Big City, agrees. “These measures can work well if you’re applying for a job in a field that rewards that sort of thinking, such as advertising or marketing,” she says “Otherwise, it shows you to be a loose cannon.”

So how does a job seeker stand out in a market where, according to Bell, one job listing can attract 300 or more applicants? “Make sure your résumé contains all the keywords in the ad,” she says. Many companies use screening software that will immediately weed out your application if you don’t have the same skills enumerated in the job listing.

“Enable yourself to your network,” says Salemi. Every meeting, every graduation party, every birthday, every hour on the golf course is a potential networking opportunity. So have your elevator speech ready -- wherever you go. And when you do get that interview, she advises, “Be polished. Shave. Don’t swear. And even if you normally wear three earrings, take them out.”

Few hiring managers could legally admit this, says Morgenlander, but “people always hire individuals whom they like and like to look at -- even if they’re not the most qualified candidates for the position.” So it behooves you to find out as much about the hiring manager as you can in advance. Use Facebook and LinkedIn to investigate common ground you might have, and discuss those shared interests when you get a foot (not a shoe!) in the door for an interview.

In the long run, if you follow these proven techniques, you’ll have a much better shot at the job than you’ll have hanging out next to the headquarters of Intel or Bank of America in a rented gorilla suit. Besides, says Morgenlander, “Who wants to be wearing a gorilla suit in summertime anyway?”

You’ve gotta see this!!!

Remember when you’d get an email or text with those words in the subject line every couple of months or so? Then it became every week. Now these must-see edicts come in so fast you can hardly keep track of them. And they all contain links to the latest viral videos making the rounds on YouTube.

It’s easy enough to shoot some footage and stick it on the net. But how do you make a YouTube flick good enough to click?

“The success of most YouTube videos is mainly due to a mix of timing, talent and luck,” says Howard Wilmot, director of London based All-Leo.com, a digital communications company specialising in social media, public relations and branded online content. “But there are things you can do to position your video so it stands the best chance of exposure.”

According to Wilmot, production value isn’t really an issue. There’s no point in hiring a professional film crew or paying for a sound studio, because what people really connect with is authenticity. In fact, using a basic video camera and your dad’s vegetable plot as a backdrop might actually work better. A good example of this is a YouTube video entitled Guitar 90. It’s just a guy in a baseball cap and a T-shirt playing a guitar in his bedroom. Yet it has received more than 76 million views.

“Before you begin, ask yourself who your audience is,” advises Wilmot. “Think about why they’d want to spend five minutes of their day watching your video and how it will add value and be relevant to their lives — give people a reason to tune in and pass it on and you’ll already have put yourself ahead of the pack.”

After you’ve uploaded your masterpiece, you’ll need to make sure your intended viewers can find it. “Search Engine Optimisation (SEO) is a critical first step. SEO is like sat nav -- it tells the search engines where your site is, what it’s about, which pages do what and how you can be found,” says Sally Walker, a pioneer of social media management and the director of Sally Walker Media Labs. “SEO is the foundation on which your marketing plan is built.”

Keep in mind that the YouTube search platform is similar to Google in that it relies on tagged keywords and descriptions to sort and deliver content to users. The better your tags, the more easily your video will be found, and the more traffic you’ll get. And take advantage of YouTube’s subscription feature by encouraging people to subscribe to your postings. Subscribers are automatically notified whenever you upload a new video, which gives you the advantage of having a built-in audience for your future productions. Plus, subscribers are more likely to view new material, become fans and increase your overall number of views. 

But if you really want to get your creation out there, it’s going to take some extra effort. The Internet is about collaboration, and a good place to start is to look for a likeminded blogger who’d be open to working with you. “Blogs rule the social media world at the moment, but what they are also good for is showcasing and linking to your YouTube videos,” adds Walker. “Attach their links to suitable forums, message boards and all of your social media profiles (such as Twitter, Facebook, Bebo and LinkedIn). And add links to your email signatures, to press releases and to all your online and offline marketing strategies.”

It sounds like a lot of work, but the gamble can mean a big payoff. Nevertheless, don’t worry if you haven’t ‘gone viral’ and the views aren’t piling up by the millions in the first few days. Even for the pros, getting eyeballs in front of screens can be a challenge. “In any medium it’s very hard to create something that jumps right off the page and attracts mass interest,” concludes Wilmot. “Consequently, I think viral marketing is a myth. The best you can do is to be highly strategic about your use of social media.”

My current situation:

About to embark on a weeklong international trip, where I’ll have little or no Web or cell access.

My dilemma:

My to-do list is shorter than it was yesterday, but there’s one thing I’ve yet to cross off: finishing this article. Oh, the irony.

I’ve always envied the organizational habits of friends who can leave for a vacation without spending as many hours preparing for their absence as they plan to spend being absent. Determined to master their secrets, I sought the counsel of some organizational pros, the sort of folks who always have perfectly sharpened pencils on their desks and impeccably labeled files in their cabinets.

Get Organized -- For Good

Peggy Duncan, a personal productivity expert based in Atlanta says the key to enjoying a holiday without leaving mayhem behind is to be organized all year round. “For people who work stressed out every day and then go on vacation for a week, the break will not do them any good.”

Even for those who are able to put work out of mind before a trip, Duncan is not hopeful about what they will encounter on their return: “They’ll have to deal with the week of chaos that built up because of how disorganized they are.”

Stay in Touch

John Trosko, a professional organizer based in Los Angeles, offered some (metaphorical) adhesive bandages. He says he urges people to maintain at least some contact with the office while they’re away. “How really unplugged from work do you need to be?” he asks. “When I was a production coordinator for Walt Disney Animation Studios, I had a coronary every time I went on vacation. Now, with our smartphones and laptops, it just feels a little easier.”

Give Access, Get Automated

Even for those who prefer to be “off-grid” while they’re gone, Trosko offers these bits of advice:

1. Delegate to a good team.

   If within your control, have a good team in place to fulfill time-sensitive responsibilities while you’re away. And make sure outsiders know who to call for assistance with urgent queries.

2. Share important documents

   with those who’ll need to access them via tools such as Google Docs or SharePoint.

3. Allow an assistant to access your email

   while you’re gone so spam and non-important messages can be deleted before you return.

4. Set up an auto response

   using keywords so that any emails pertaining to ongoing but mundane situations can be handled automatically.

5. If your office is a mess, clean it.

   Typically operate using the excavating-though-a-large-desk-pile system? Ask yourself whether it’ll be as “logical” for others who might need to pitch in while you’re gone. Don’t count on your colleagues to be able to find everything they need all on their own. Before leaving, put all important items in one area -- ideally in a binder -- for easy access.

Hit the Return Key

And what about maintaining your sanity (and relaxation) post-vacation? Duncan has these pointers:

1. Spend one day in the office the weekend before you’re due back at work.

   It’s worth giving up a day on your weekend so you can come back more calm. Just treat yourself to something special when you finish getting caught up.

2. Schedule no meetings

   the first two days after your return.

3. Arrive extra early

   -- before most of your associates arrive in the office -- on your first day back to work.

“I’ve systemized my business,” explains Duncan, who is also the author of The Time Management Memory Jogger. “Because I work smart all the time, I don’t ever feel like I have to take a break.”

I don’t know whether I’ll ever achieve Duncan’s level of Zen, but the good news -- at least for now -- is, I’ve still got a few hours to get to the airport, and this story is done. Even better, I now know how to make my next vacation a stress-free one before, during and after.

The Summer Olympics may come only once every four years, but the (tiki) torch lighting of your own Beach Olympics can happen any time -- as long as you’ve got sand, water, a volleyball net, a plastic flying disc and that age-old desire to pummel your buddies in contests of strength and stamina.

“Competing in events and being out on the beach brings out the inner athlete in everyone,” says Michelle Knight, co-owner of Adventures by the Sea, a Monterey, Calif.-based adventure-planning outfit.

Organizing tip No. 1: Limit your olympiad to a couple of hours at most so energy won’t drop and tempers won’t rise. Tip No. 2: Plan the individual events carefully.

“Choose games that will really appeal to everyone and match your group’s fitness level,” says Cynthia Shon, president of Bay Area, Calif.-based Corporate Games, an organization that helps companies foster team building among employees. “Remember that running around on sand is not easy.”

The events below -- picked by our dream team of athletic contest-organizing experts -- should ease your burden. And heck, most of these will work in a grassy park if there’s no beach around. What to use for gold medals is up to you.

Beach Volleyball
This is the one must-do contest in any Beach Olympics. Anyone who’s ever taken gym class already knows how to play. And thanks to the sand, taking a heroic dive for the ball will make you look like a stud without scraping or bruising. Traditional volleyball rules work great, but if you’ve got eight or more people, Kevin Vander Vliet, owner of Team Building California suggests this variation: Create four teams and set up four nets connecting at 90-degree angles in the center. (So the nets form an X.) If the ball’s served to you, you can hit it across to any of the other three teams. Normal rules for serves and point scoring apply. “It’s a lot of fun because if you have one team that’s really good, the others can gang up to beat them,” says Vander Vliet.
Official rules: Volleyball.com/rules.aspx

Sand Ultimate
This is another easy-to-organize, fun-to-play favorite. But when you’re on sand, the going is too slow for people to be sprinting all around the playing area, like in typical Ultimate. So Shon applies slightly different rules. “We mark off assigned boxes where one person from each team stays. That way there’s less running but people are still diving for the frisbee,” she says.
Official rules: UltimateHandbook.com

Flying Disc Golf
It’s adaptable to the terrain of just about any beach and easy to set up. If you’re using teams, then play by “scramble” rules like in real golf. Here’s how it goes: Everyone tees off. Choose whose throw on your team was the best, and then you and all your teammates take your second shot from where that disc landed. Repeat until reaching the end of the hole. “There’s great team interaction. There are always some people who have rarely, if ever, thrown a frisbee, and the other team members really get into teaching and helping them,” says Knight.
Official rules: Pdga.com/rules

Tug of War
This one needs little explaining. You can buy a thick rope made especially for the sport at FlagHouse.com. If you’re really ambitious, you can dig a shallow “pit of shame” for the losers to fall into.

Balloon Launch
A surprise favorite among the experts, chosen because it involves strength, aim and luck -- and requires the kind of open space a beach provides. You’ll need a three-person balloon launcher. (There’s one available at Amazon.com.) Then, instead of the hassle of filling up balloons, use foam balls (available at sporting goods stores) and soak them in water before you shoot. Points can be scored based on distance or for hitting specific targets.

Relay Race
This is the grueling grand finale -- much of what’s in it will be based on your imagination, as well as the terrain, size and crowdedness of the beach.

As part of the relay, you can have a kayak race, a fill-the-bucket-with-water event using only your hands, a three-legged race in the water, a beach chair obstacle course or a combat crawl through the sand (maybe under a fishnet).

Vander Vliet recommends you include elements that involve brains over brawn as part of the relay, like a jigsaw puzzle that the team has to complete before advancing (very “Survivor”-esque, no?). “Putting in mental elements is an equalizer if one team is better physically than the other,” he says.

One team challenge that combines both the physical and mental aspects is a paper plate minefield. Blindfold one person per team, and have his teammates verbally guide him around the plates, from one end of the minefield to the other. If he steps on one, he starts over. The options are limitless.
Official rules: Wikipedia.org

Still struggling to find your masculine mojo? Or maybe you’re just looking to torque up your sense of style, witty banter or modern-music street cred. If you’re looking to be a better man (and we assume that’s why you’re here!), it might not hurt to take a peek at your telly for some “TV Guy-dance.” (Oh, yes, we did!)

That’s right, many of the best role models can be found right in your living room! Here are a few useful TV shows we recommend you monitor closely to help you get your man on.

1. Suit up in style.
You don’t have to show up for work looking like the guy who’s there to water the plants anymore. Check out “Mad Men”’s Don Draper and the rest of the retro dudes who’ve set fashion back 40 years -- and gotten a whole lot of women being a lot more nostalgic as a result of their backward-thinking fashion statements. Think: seer-sucker suits, slicked-back hair and super-skinny ties making everything old new and hot again. So if you want to cut a stylish look in the future, take a step back into the ’60s, son.

2. Get in tune with the coolest new bands.
Before “Scrubs” flatlined this season, it held the distinct honor of being the venue for the coolest tunes on the tube. Rock, pop and indie artists used to fight for the right to have their stuff wind up in the ending montages that summed up each episode’s themes. Artists who scrubbed in included Lazlo Blane, The Shins and the Butthole Surfers.

But since this useful TV show went belly up in March, the best place to get a diagnosis of the best new beats is (sigh) the girly “Grey’s Anatomy.” Always featuring new -- and surprising -- cool acts, each episode is themed and named after a song. (The show was instrumental in launching the careers of Snow Patrol and The Fray.)

Also, if you can repeat this information to any girl (we have scientific data that proves they worship this show), they’ll find you sensitive and open-minded.

3. Learn how to treat a woman … by watching football!
It turns out that some of the most sensitive and supportive men play or coach football. Surprised? Don’t be -- this is a TV show we’re talking about.

The men and boys on “Friday Night Lights” are largely solid citizens (when they’re not juicing or boozing, that is). But when they’re standing up, they’re standup guys.

The high school coach makes sure his players follow his game plan as he dutifully respects and works for his loving wife -- who also happens to be the principal. And this season, the star quarterback is willing to follow the golden rules when he steps out of bounds and knocks up a cheerleader. He wants to take care of the girl and the baby and be a dad.

In every case, when the guys are under the gun, they take care of their women with all-star style. Follow their playbook, and you’ll score with any woman.

4. Get your black belt in banter.
Want to be the funniest guy in the room without having to take off your pants … again? Then watch the better-man-friendly “30 Rock.” Pilfer a healthy dose of dialogue from this useful TV show, inject it into your real-life shtick, and you’ll never lack for wit again.

Take this exchange between Liz Lemon (Tina Fey) and boss man Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) as a quality case study of classic comebacks. Her question: “Why are you wearing a tuxedo?” His answer? “It’s after 6. What am I, a farmer?”

Looking for more versatile quips? Try these other classic “Rock” classics:

• “I want to go to there.”

  Faux overstatement, phrased to mimic preschool-type desire for something. Works great to express instant overpowering infatuation with a lady.

• “What the what?!?”

  To express dumbfoundedness in a way that conveys hip, ironic wit to the elite class (while simultaneously mocking the vulgar and illiterate classes).

• “Oh … sarcasm!”

  A sarcastic way of acknowledging lame sarcasm expressed by others.

• “Well played, [insert your foil’s name here]. Well played.”

  A tongue-in-cheek, pseudo-classic-gentlemanly way of acknowledging victory to a foe relating to an issue that ultimately lacks importance. Hyperbolic.