If anything exemplifies the perplexing polarities of what women want, it’s men’s skin. She wants your face soft as a baby’s butt ... but with the rugged appearance of a veteran cowboy. She wants you to have that “JLo glow,” but the masculine version. She tells you to get regular melanoma screenings and to keep an eye out for suspicious moles -- all without keeping a pasty, Kabuki-white pallor. Go figure.

Here are five tips from the pros to achieve this feels-smooth-but-looks-rugged men’s skin dichotomy she finds so irresistible:

1. Drink up.

No, we’re not talking about beverages from a can or bottle -- we’re talking tea. Says Denise Vitello, spa director of the Mandarin Oriental in New York: Drinking warm ginger tea to support the circulation of blood will give you that flush chicks read as healthy and sexy (without the dripping sweat you get when you work out).

2. Read the labels.

No, not the protein and carb content in your protein shake (that’s another story), but rather the ones on your “products” -- from zit medication to sunblock. “The ingredients you put on your body are just as important as the ingredients you put in your body. Skin is the body's largest organ (it lives and dies) and needs nourishment to encourage regeneration of healthy skin cells,” explains Cecily Braden, president of Beauty Secrets, a company that produces organic skin care products for professional spa use.

3. Don’t suffer.

“Waiting to reach for the ChapStick and having your lips crack puts you at risk for lip cancer,” warns certified plastic surgical nurse Joan Dallal. So don’t think you’re pulling some kind of macho move by holding out -- you're just being mucho dumb. Bonus unfortunateness: “Men also have to reapply sunblock more often than women because they sweat more,” says Dallal.

4. Foresee your future.

“Your skin is nothing like your mom’s or sister’s -- it’s oilier and more acidic than women’s skin,” says Dr. Isabel Souffront, an internist specializing in cosmetic skin care. “Sure it’s denser, thicker and firmer because you have more collagen than women, but unless you take care of it, expect it to thin quickly and to have deep lines.” Bottom line: Pass the skin cream, bro.

5. Take time to shave.

“Rushing in the a.m. can really end up hurting your face if you’re multitasking and not paying attention,” warns Kristen Haines, winner of the Juli B Style Skincare Professional Esthetician of the Year award. What’s that, you say? You already shaved with too much pressure, against the grain, using a dubious razor? Soften the blow by reaching for moisturizer instead of aftershave.
 

You think she’s looking at your shoes or your bulging biceps? Nah, the first thing she notices is your skin, “so take that extra minute or two to pull that razor across your face and use the right product,” recommends Haines. “There is nothing sexier than a smooth, irresistible face.”

Eyebrows are one of those mysterious facial features that can make a huge difference in your appearance … but generally go unnoticed unless something about them is terribly wrong (like, say, you’re still sporting a unibrow or accidentally singed them off over a barbecue -- it happens).
 
When it comes to eyebrow grooming for men, it boils down to three simple things: de-bulking, shaping and knowing where brows should start and end.
 
Really thick eyebrows may call for major eyebrow grooming, so you may want to visit a salon -- a trained aesthetician can do them the first time and give you a good reference point for maintaining them solo.
 
Still, most guys can whack these little weeds themselves at home. Just follow a few simple rules. …

First, you’ll need to have the right tools on hand: razor, small electric trimmer, grooming scissors and tweezers. Next, shower or wash your face before attempting to shave or tweeze the area. The hot water and steam open up your pores and follicles and soften the hair, making the process easier (and less painful). Plus, this will help prevent ingrown hairs.

Now you’re ready for the big browbeating. Here’s how.

Length
First, get rid of excess hair in the middle and the outside ends. The inside edges of your brows should line up with the inside corner of your eyes -- anything else is in unibrow territory and should be removed. To determine where your brows should end, use this simple trick: Take a pencil and place one end at the outside edge of your nostril, then rotate it so that it points towards the outside edge of your eye -- that’s where the brow should end.

As for how to get rid of those stray border crossers, take a razor and use short light strokes but take heed: A razor allows more room for error -- remember Steve Carell’s slipup in The 40-Year-Old Virgin that left him browless? -- but the hair will grow back quickly. On the other hand, you can use tweezers to pluck these areas, but you’ll have to be extra-careful; repeated tweezing can cause permanent hair loss.

Thickness
Next, ditch the bulk with grooming scissors or a small electric trimmer. You want to remove just enough hair so the brows look tamed, not overly trussed. You don’t want to cut the hair so short that it refuses to lie flat against your face.

If you have fine hair, brush it upward, then trim till it’s about 5 millimeters long. If you have coarse hair, pick out one hair and trim it slowly, a little at a time, till it’s short but still lies flat. Then use it as a marker for the rest of the hairs.

And slow down -- this isn’t a race. It should take you at least a few minutes to do a proper job.

Shape
To arch or not to arch … that is the question. And the answer depends on your face shape. If it’s long and skinny, or anchored by a particularly strong jawline, you should probably forget about sculpting your brows into an arch -- thicker, horizontal brows can help divide your face to make it look shorter and draw people’s gazes up and away from the jaw. On the other hand, if you have a round or square face, a prominent arch can create the illusion of a longer face.

As a general rule of thumb, the arch should peak directly above the pupil; make a note of where that is, then use tweezers to remove hairs directly underneath that point until you’ve defined the shape.

There are easier, more effective, ways to look like a million bucks than by plunking down that much on some surgical solution -- the way some Hollywood pretty-boy wannabe would. And just your luck: all involve treating your body better. It’s true, a healthier lifestyle can actually boost your physical appearance -- targeting everything from your complexion, to those bags under your eyes, to the sheen of your hair.

Follow these 10 simple health and nutrition tips to make the face staring at you in the mirror hotter than ever.

1. Care about skin care.
Too often, this advice is sloughed off like dead epidermal cells. But listen anyway: Use moisturizers to keep your skin from drying out -- and more importantly, apply sunscreen to curb premature aging and undue damage from ultraviolet rays bound to resurface in the form of leather-textured moles or other such unpleasantnesses.

“If men would simply do this, it would make the biggest difference in their appearance,” says Dr. Leslie Baumann, a dermatologist and author of the best-seller The Skin Type Solution. Make it a habit, like shaving or brushing your teeth, she suggests.

2. Butt out.
As in, stop smoking. “Cigarettes cause worse wrinkling than the sun,” stresses Dr. Brooke Seckel, a plastic surgeon and author of Save Your Face -- The Revolutionary 6-Step Nonsurgical Facial Rejuvenation Program. Smoking robs the skin of collagen and elastin -- which give the skin texture, strength and elasticity -- and in turn speeds up the aging process. Cigarette use can also give the skin a grayish tone. Hot!

3. Eat right.
A healthy diet equals a more glowing complexion, shinier hair and a fitter you.

“The key is to stay well balanced,” says Jim White, a fitness and nutrition expert, and a spokesman for the American Dietetic Association. “Oatmeal is a great power food. It’s loaded with fiber and can help manage hunger and lower cholesterol. Cottage cheese, meanwhile, is low in sugar and high in protein and calcium.”

Overall, stick closely to a Mediterranean-type diet, with few high-fat meats and larger amounts of grains, fish and olive oil.

4. Sleep.
Get the recommended eight hours a night, at least. “Sleeping restores all organs of the body, including the skin, which is the body’s largest organ,” notes Seckel. “It also reduces tension and anxiety, lessening crow’s feet, frown lines and worry lines.”

Lack of sleep also causes those dreaded circles under your eyes. (See our Facebook photos.)

5. Hydrate.
“Skin needs water to function properly, especially to fight damage caused by the sun,” says Baumann. Drinking the recommended eight glasses a day additionally flushes toxins from the body and brings nutrients to the deep layer of the skin (the dermis).

6. Slenderize.
Trimming down will not only improve your appearance but also reduce your risk of stroke, diabetes, cancer and other diseases.

“Don’t go on some radical diet. Instead think about portion control,” says White. “Shave your calorie intake by 500 a day by cutting back on some vices like fried foods, and you’ll lose a sensible pound or two a week.”

7. Be pro-antioxidant.
Antioxidants like vitamins A, C and E found in fruits and vegetables are essential. They promote skin repair and elasticity and also reduce your risk for heart disease and cancer, says White.

8. Do cardio.
A cardio workout regimen lowers stress, makes you happier and gives your skin a glow. “Do any kind of aerobic exercise that will raise your heart rate above baseline for half an hour a day, says Dr. Douglas Peterson, a sports medicine specialist at the Mayo Clinic. “It could be going for a walk, taking a bike ride or using the elliptical -- something that works up a sweat a little. Don’t do too much too fast or you’ll get injured and quit. Exercise should be fun, and you should feel good doing it.”

9. Watch the booze.
“Alcohol causes swelling of the tissues, especially puffy eyes, and often leads to bad eating habits -- causing weight gain -- and smoking,” warns Seckel.

10. Stand tall.
Good posture really is a good thing. Core strength training will get rid of that unseemly slouch. (Plus, a new set of six pack abs is definitely an appearance improvement.) Dr. Peterson recommends light resistance training two to three times a week to strengthen core muscles. A certified personal trainer can work with you on a regimen that you can follow at home.

A few swipes of the blade can highlight your best -- and distract from your, well, less than best -- facial features. Here’s how.

The hair on your face can work the same kind of magic as the hair on your head: The right cut can make you more handsome; the wrong one can emphasize your flaws.

“The general rule with facial hair is that you want it to offset the shape of your face and the size of your features,” says Eddie “Champ” Hall, owner and head of faculty at Champ’s Barber School in Pennsylvania. “If your face is long and skinny, a chinstrap beard can create the illusion of width; if it’s round, a goatee will help draw the eye down and make your face appear longer; if it’s square, a circle beard can help soften the jawline.”

And when it comes to trends, it’s not always the best idea to take your cues from Hollywood. The Van Dyck look (a mustache and pointy goatee -- think Mickey Rourke in The Wrestler) was all over the red carpet at last year’s Oscars, but it’s not a look everyone can pull off.  

Here’s how to get the look you want:

Circle Beard
Looks like: A small chin beard that connects around the mouth to the mustache, creating a circle or oval shape. Also referred to as a “door knocker.”

Good for: Square faces. This style helps soften the jawline and adds curves.

How to get it: “In general, you want to grow a lot more hair than you think you’ll need,” says Cori Randall, New York City-based hairstylist and instructor. “Grow a full beard, 2 to 3 inches in length, and then shape it down using clippers, making sure the outside lines are sharp and even and line up with your smile lines.”

Goatee
Looks like: A small chin beard resembling the facial hair on a billy goat.

Good for: Round faces, especially those with double chins, because it helps draw the eye down and make the face appear longer.

How to get it: “Completely shave the cheeks and upper lip,” says Hall. “Then shape the area around, and slightly under, the chin into a desired patch of hair.”

Balbo
Looks like: A mustache combined with hair on the chin (basically a circle beard, minus the connection between the two patches of hair).

Good for: Square and oval faces, to add curves.

How to get it: “Just like the circle beard, you’re going to need a lot of hair to work with,” says Randall, “so you’ll need to grow it out for a few weeks.” Then use a razor to completely shave off the cheek area and the connection between the chin hair and mustache.

Van Dyck
Looks like: A mustache and a separate pointed goatee. It’s named after the 17th-century Flemish portrait artist of the same name, who often sported the look and used it in his paintings.

Good for: Square and oval faces, to add curves.

How to get it: “Again, this is a look where you’ll need to grow out a full beard before you trim it down into shape,” says Hall. When you have enough hair to form a slightly longish goatee, “shave the cheeks until you have a circle beard, then carefully remove the connection between the two patches of hair and continue removing hairs until you get your desired shape.”

Chinstrap
Looks like: A line of facial hair that extends from the sideburns and runs all the way along the jawline.

Good for: Round and oval face shapes, to introduce lines and angles.

How to get it: Shave the cheeks, upper lip and chin area, leaving a strip of hair along the jawline. “Start out by leaving a wider strip of hair than you think you need,” says Hall. “You can always narrow it down to a desired width later on.”

Soul Patch
Looks like: A small patch of hair -- circular, square or triangular -- located directly below the lower lip above the chin. The look was made popular by beatniks and jazz musicians in the 1950s and ’60s.

Good for: Any face shape, to add character and style.

How to get it: “The key to creating this look is absolute symmetry,” says Randall. “Shape it slowly from both sides, using your chin and mouth as guideposts.”

Whether your back resembles the Amazon or you just think below-the-belt topiary’s cool, here’s what you need to know before you begin.

Remember that guy in middle school with all the back hair? He probably had a nickname like “werewolf” or “yeti.” And he had no choice but to learn the art of body shaving, better known as manscaping, at an early age (or it’s possible that he was so scarred from the locker room jokes that he turned into a recluse and didn’t bother).

Now that you’re older and pumping out more testosterone than when you sneaked into PG-13 movies, the subject of body hair isn’t quite as funny. Whether or not to shave -- and where -- is entirely personal. But being clean and tidy is definitely in.

“It is one of those things that men are finally comfortable talking about,” says Dr. Lisa Kellett, a dermatologist. “Many men are acquiring a more tailored, less hairy look.”

Successful manscaping without nicks or ingrown hairs involves somewhat different strategies than those used for shaving the face. Here are tips for clearing hair -- all the way down to the groin, where it can sometimes be hard to spot the lion in the tall grass.

Anywhere
Always manscape after or during a shower so the skin and hair is completely softened. To get an even smoother shave, shear any long hair with an electric trimmer or scissors, says Dr. Jeffrey Benabio, a dermatologist and skin care expert. Then apply shaving gel or cream and use a razor that adjusts to the shape of your body. Rinse it often.

Armpits
Remember the cardinal rule of shaving: don’t apply pressure with the razor. To avoid nicks and ingrown hairs, let it glide across the skin. When you’re finished, avoid an alcohol-based deodorant for a while: It’ll irritate.

Chest
Sure, women shave against the grain on their legs, but don’t follow their lead, especially on the chest, where the skin is softer. Glide the razor mostly downhill except around the nipples -- you’ll need to be extra careful here. (Losing a nipple would make for lots of stares at the beach -- not the good kind.) Follow the hair’s varying directions and be sure not to nick the coarse skin.

Back
Don’t try this alone. The person shaving should merely follow the advice above (shave with grain, let razor glide, etc.). A few more words of wisdom, though: don’t ask a girl to do this on your first date.

Groin
Again, cut the hair short first. Then use a fresh blade, pulling the skin as taut and flat as possible. Use only light, short strokes. These last tips are especially important when clearing the brush around the tree, so to speak. There’s no real danger to hitting any veins or lopping anything off in this, um, especially sensitive area.

Still, nicks are easier to get if you’re not meticulous. When you’re done, use moisturizer or else the area could itch for days and result in ingrown hairs -- the manscape from which there’s no escape.